Why Do I Love God?

I was just pondering this question the other day.  I was thinking about how God unconditionally loves me, and if I could do the same for Him.  He did die for me, after all.  It’s an amazing question, and one which I think everyone should should have to answer.  And are there right and wrong ways, right and wrong motives for loving God?  I wonder.

One of the first reasons that I thought of was that I am commanded to love God.  That’s very true(Duet. 6:5).  Although, I think it’s much more than that.  You see, God always commands us to do things that are good for us.  Following His commands shouldn’t be a chore, if we’ve received the heart of them.  And if love was just a command, it wouldn’t be a very deep love at all.

Anyway, we’re not under the bondage of the law anymore.  We’re under grace(Rom. 6:14).  With the new covenant created by Jesus’ death on the cross, we have grace, forgiveness and victory.  So, is that why I love God?  Do I love Him because He’s given me so many blessings?  Well, yeah, but I don’t love Him just for what He’s given me.  If that were the case, He’d just be buying my affections.  No one, especially God, would want that kind of shallow, one-sided love.  In addition, we’ll all have trials and suffering at some point.  If the benefits are the foundation of our love, it will quickly dissolve in those times.

No, our love for God should be very simple, I think.  It shouldn’t be out of a sense of obligation or legalism.  He is Love.  When you know who He is, I don’t think you can help it.  He’s very lovable.  I love God because I believe He is who He says He is.  He is God, and He is good.  He is the Lover, and I am His beloved.  We just love each other. I think it’s as simple as that.

“And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.”
–Hebrews 11:6

Do Not Lose Heart

What does depression do?  Where does depression hurt?  It’s your heart.  It makes you lose heart.  I have friends who are struggling with this horrible, deadly disease, and I can say that most times I feel powerless to in any way help them.  It is almost unfathomable to me, how anyone could be so down, especially Christians who are supposed to know the ever-reaching love of God.  It’s frustrating.

But you know, I have the love of Christ in me.  So I know that I won’t ever give up on them.  I can be there to encourage and to pray.  I can come against any and every evil spirit of pride, hate or depression that’s taken a hold of my brother in Christ.  I just wish something would really happen, like drastically.  And I can’t see much progress.  I wish God would work faster, but I must trust in His perfect timing.

There’s only so much encouragement I or anyone else can give.  There is a limit to our human abilities, our medical remedies.  But there is no limit to the glorious power of the Spirit of God.  He places light and hope into our hearts.  He transforms us from the inside out.  He does it for me, and He does it for the suffering people around me.  My role as an intercessor is this: to lift them up into the hands of God and let Him do His perfect work.  It’s hard sometimes, but I’ll keep praying.  Because that’s what love is.  Love doesn’t give up.

“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”–2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Do Not Love The World

I wonder sometimes, what kind of anointing the early apostles had?  How could they, mere fishermen-turned-students, end up transforming the world the way they did?  I think it was because, they believed.  They knew personally, intimately, the God whom they served.  The Holy Spirit dwelt within them.  They had a commission and a mission field: to make disciples of the entire world.

Funny thing is, we have all those same things.  So why don’t we have the same anointing?  There must be something more than these.  I think, maybe, it’s our character.  Has anyone ever heard of faithfulness or humility?  How about holiness and consecration?  Can we do the little things, or are our heads too full of extravagant dreams to realize we’ve never left the starting line?  Are we too proud to learn or to accept correction?  Are we in love with the world and the things of the world?  Can we say we belong to God when we are too busy pursuing pleasure to pray?  I’ll let you answer for yourself.

There is a strange extreme nature to the gospel.  His name is Jealous.  He will not share you with any other lover.  Love what He loves: Himself, yourself, other people, and the rest of His creation.  Hate what he hates: rebellion, pride, injustice, and all other forms of sin.  It’s a different way than what I’m seeing now.  And I’m not telling you to never watch TV again.  I’m just making an observation: if we really lived for Him, I don’t believe we’d  be watching much TV.

“And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.”–1 John 2:17

Love is the Commandment

I was studying the book of 1 John last night, and one thing became very clear to me.  Love for God and love for our brothers is entirely connected.  Now, I love God and my brothers(I’m on the right track!), but definitely not as much as I could.  The good news is, He is faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us from all unrighteousness if we confess our faults.  That’s amazing!  If we continue to walk with Him, it is impossible to keep sinning.  The reason?  We love because He first loved us.  Jesus Christ is the Savior.

This is my prayer, that I could love others the way Jesus did, not just in word, but in deed and truth.  I know now more than ever before, that I will.

“By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.”–1 John 3:16

A Lion in Sheep’s Clothing

I hope you’ll allow me to share a personal struggle.  It’s something I’ve tried to deal with on my own for many years, and I know I could really use your prayers.  And who knows, maybe some of you are dealing with something similar.  Maybe my discussion can be of some use to you.

Here it is: I think I’ve “hit a wall” in a very real spiritual sense.  This wall’s name is Fear.  I’m actually a little glad I’ve hit it.  That means I’ve come far enough along to realize its presence.  Of course, I’d be happy if it wasn’t there.  Actually, I’d be happy if I never had another struggle in my life, but that’s not the way life works.  In this life, there are struggles, and I must learn to conquer them.

Over the past year or so, God has been bringing this issue to the forefront of my consciousness.  I’ve even received prophesies from complete strangers, pointing this out: that a Spirit of Fear has its hold on me.  How can I best describe it?  I’ll use the words a good friend of mine prophetically spoke over me Sunday:  I am a lion in sheep’s clothing, and the devil is holding the zipper shut.

Ever since I was young, I’ve felt the call of evangelism on my life.  When I first got to FSU, I’d have dreams and visions of me preaching on corners.  When I first read the Bible all the way through, the verses on preaching, like Romans 10:14, seemed to jump off the page at me.  It seems like every day I’d have an urge to share the gospel with someone.  But most times, I’d ignore the voice of God and give in to fear.  I’ve been disobedient.

I know I have boldness inside!  All of us who’ve been born again do; I’m sure of it.  But we run into these walls.  For some, it may be a wall of anger or bitterness, distraction, apathy or depression.  For me it’s the fear of man.  I’ve come back again from my backsliding to the wall.  Sometimes I feel like I’m just chipping away at it with a pencil.  At least I’m trying those times.  Sometimes I miss on purpose, demonically content with doing nothing.  I look back on those times with sadness, because I know I’ve grieved the heart of God.

Why not obey?  Why not have faith?  Why not take a stand?  There is no logical reason why I can’t.  I know the God I serve is much, much bigger than any wall I will ever face.  I must repent.  I must trust in Him.  Please pray for me.

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.”–2 Timothy 1:7

Jesus, Reality

I have eternal life.  And so can you.  It’s easy.  Just give everything.

Receive Everything.

Why is there war?  …
Why do we kill each other?  …
What is honor?  …

What is Love?  Jesus.  Know that one… not well enough.

Think for a minute, for a day.  We are here for much, much more than we know.  People are hurting, you know.  We are here, and God is in us.  What does that make us?  Servants.

Let your heart break for this world.  His does.

It’s raining.  When will the sun shine again?

“Jesus wept.”–John 11:35

Eternal Life

I don’t know what most people think when they hear the term “eternal life.”  Perhaps they think of heaven, that wonderful paradise where we all end up when we die.  That’s good, I suppose.  That’s definitely part of it.  But it misses the point, I think.  It tells us where but not Whom.

The Whom, you see, is Jesus Christ, the One who gives us that life.  I believe eternal life is less about the where and when and approximately all about Jesus.  In fact, according to 1 John 5:20, Jesus = eternal life.  Did you know that you can have eternal life right now?  Yes, it’s true.  Jesus died and rose  again.  He is alive right now, waiting to come back to a pure and spotless bride who loves Him with everything she has.

If you’re going to believe in Him, then get to know Him.  Love God.  A shallow “belief” is worthless.  Just read John 8:31-59, and note verse 31.  They were “believers,” but Jesus knew their hearts.  If you are offended by His Word, check your heart.  You may think you’re a good person, but if you don’t really know Him, you’ll be in for a shock when you enter eternity.

Eternal life is knowing God.  There’s a reason why the first commandment is what it is (Duet. 6:5).  Eternal life starts now.

“And we know that the Son of God has come and has given us understanding, so that we may know him who is true; and we are in him who is true, in his Son Jesus Christ.  He is the true God and eternal life.  Little children, keep yourselves from idols.”–1 John 5:20-21

Relentless: the Luke 18 Internship

Today, I start an internship with the International House of Prayer Tallahassee.  I’m doing it because I believe God is calling me to it, which is really the best reason to do anything, I think.  I’m not sure I even fully understand why I’m doing it, but I’m going to step out in faith regardless.  I haven’t been doing much of that lately; I think this is a great place to start.

To give you a little idea of what I’ll be doing, it’s a forty hour per week commitment, plus a little extra sometimes.  I’m taking four classes: Eschatology, Developing a Heart After God, the Heart of the Nazarite and the Lost Art of Intercession.  In addition to that, I’ll be in the prayer room for the most part, and I’ll probably be doing a good bit of worship leading.

My heart for this internship is really just to meet God and receive His love.  I’m devoting the next three months specifically for that purpose.  Maybe I’ll find something significant to run with.  Maybe I’ll get the guts to embrace the call of God on my life.  Will I change?  I don’t doubt it.  Will the world change around me?  I hope so.  So I will make my requests.  And God will be faithful.

“And will not God give justice to his elect, who cry to him day and night?  Will he delay long over them? I tell you, he will give justice to them speedily. Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?”
–Luke 18:7-8

He Lifts Me Up

In a place of brokenness I lie,
Struggling once again to speak.
And with my last vocal note
I say to Him, “Take what’s left.”

“What’s really worth anything in this world,”
Is a question I’ve often asked
Myself, others, the sky, the earth
When I fall.

Then He lifts me up
To a place where I can see
The expanse and beauty of this world,
The precious soul inside each of us.

From this height, my vision clears.
I see why we can truly love,
Why we can truly love each other,
Is because He loved us first.

Falling, descending once again
Into the depths, the dirt, the despair.
I know the light is inside me.
Jesus, let me be broken again.

Let Your light go forth into this darkness.

“I pray that your hearts will be flooded with light so that you can understand the confident hope he has given to those he called—his holy people who are his rich and glorious inheritance.”–Ephesians 1:18

Trust

I will trust God.

But how?  How many people have said that exact same thing; how many times have I said it?  And how many times have we followed through with our vow?  I know I’ve failed countless times.  Everyone can see the outside, the nice, friendly, quiet me.  I know the fear inside me all too well.  I know every time the Holy Spirit pricks my heart, and I shrink back into my comfort zone.  I wonder how many people would now be on their way to heaven if only I’d obeyed?

Oh, God.  Break the box I’ve created around myself!  I can’t live like this any more, fearing You but fearing people too.  I need Your grace.  You’ve given me a burden; help me embrace it.  In the name of Jesus I pray, amen.

“Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, ‘Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain.’ And God granted his request.”–1 Chronicles 4:10